Maybe I need to adjust the lens

I am no photographer. I enjoy taking pictures, absolutely. But I don't have the skills of knowing how to compose a shot or check the light levels. Sometimes I consider taking a class or reading a book but the notion usually passes, and I go back the simple pictures and selfies I normally take.

I recently went on a 4,000-mile roadtrip across the country. I started at Lake Erie, drove south to Kentucky, across the plains to Denver, and through the mountains and desert of Colorado, Utah and Nevada. It was a fantastic trip and much of the entertainment was simply enjoying the incredible landscapes of this immense country.

I took a lot of pictures. Digital photography is great because you can take a lot of terrible pictures and know immediately whether you need to try something else or just give up. I played around with different ideas and got to know my camera better just from trial and error. One thing I was struck by was how much my life felt like I was viewing it through a camera lens lately.

When I am in a very busy season or focused on one project, it is much like taking a close-up picture of an object like a flower or a fancy door handle or something like that. You spend a lot of time trying to get it framed just right and focused so the details stand out. But it can be very easy for me to stay in a "close-up" mode and miss what is happening around me.

It took an epic road trip across 10 states for me to "zoom out" a bit and get some perspective on life. There are so many people living lives that are so unlike mine in places that are so different from my everyday experience and I just plain forgot because I was so wrapped up in my own life. I needed to adjust the lens at which I was viewing life.

So the question is...do I need to do this more often? Focus and details are great and have their place, for sure, but I feel convicted to build some more time into my schedule to "zoom out." There is so much to see, and even though I realize how small a part of the picture I am, I still feel like I am more in focus because of it.

Can we become dependent on serving?

Recently I haven't been very consistent in going to church on Sunday. Part of the reason is my busy schedule with lots of weekend soccer tournaments, but for some reason, church hasn't been very enjoyable. I've had a hard time pinpointing why I don't enjoy attending a Sunday service.

Image from Flickr-Brian Jeffery Beggerly

For a while, I surmised this was because I don't really know that many people at my church and making connections in Ohio has been a slow process since I moved here. The relationships that connect people to the whole of the church are important for a sense of belonging. The more I think about it, the more this excuse seems irrelevant. I have been going to the same church for 2 years now and know enough people to feel I belong to the community. Then, I thought, maybe I am just not connecting with the messages and my faith isn't growing. Again, it didn't take much reflection to see that my faith has taken some giant steps forward recently and the messages I hear are relevant and convicting.

Image from RightNowMedia.org

So, what is it? Why do I hesitate to spend an hour of my Sunday at church? I am reading Matt Chandler's "To Live is Christ and to Die is Gain." Chandler talks about church as being the "lamest hobby ever," and the danger in compartmentalizing our faith to a certain location or time or setting. I think I've fallen into this trap but I am actually doing the opposite of what Chandler is talking about.

I have compartmentalized my faith walk into my quiet times during the week and my job in ministry and as a result, Sunday has become a day for my hobbies, including attending church. Perhaps I am so dependent on 'serving' through years of church leadership that now I have a difficult time 'just' singing and listening to a sermon. I guess it feels too passive and I feel I'm treating Sunday services as lectures to gather information. I never thought I would disassociate church and my faith, but that is exactly what I have been doing lately. Jesus wants us to live out our faith daily, including when we are at church. What a crazy notion! In my effort to live out my faith in other areas of my life, I forgot to take the time to praise and worship God with the church community to which I belong and make it about Him and not about the Sunday routine or the camaraderie of fellow believers. The great thing is, the more I get it wrong, the sweeter it is when I really rest and receive God's grace and forgiveness.

Are words necessary?

Image from quotesvalley.com

For many years I have loved the quote "Preach the gospel at all times, and when necessary use words." This quote comes in various forms and is often attributed to Francis of Assisi. I think I like this idea because I don't think of myself as being much of a talker, especially with people I don't know well. Over the years, I have learned how to be social and the skill of making 'small talk,' but really, I prefer to be by myself or around people that I know very well.

This month, I have been reading "Teaching to Change Lives" by Howard Hendricks. I was struck by a concept in the book on the communication of the gospel. Hendricks says, "If witness through our lives alone was enough, then everyone exposed to Jesus Christ during his time on earth should have been converted. He was the only person who ever lived a perfect life, yet even he shared his message verbally as well." Jesus was an example everywhere he went, but lives didn't change simply because Jesus came into contact with people. He also needed to speak the truth and share God's plan of salvation.

For me, this is convicting. I would rather not talk to people about Christ or "be annoying" by speaking up with the truth when it is needed. I would rather serve, be busy with activity, try to be a good example, and not cause controversy by being too honest. But this is not the call of following Christ. We must also speak and communicate to others the truth and wisdom that has been imparted to us. My theology shouldn't be shaped only by quotes or passages that fit my personality.

Prayer...why do we minimize it?

Prayer is a funny thing. Often when I pray, I want it to sound good. I want other people to be impressed with my prayers. I want to pray for the right things, but often pray for things that only I care about. And after I pray, I don't let my mind stay focused. I wander right back to the daily distractions and quickly forget about what I just prayed for.

 

Photo used with permission from Sports Friends

I think one of the reasons my prayers can be trivial is because I forget who I am praying to. God. You know, the God of the universe. The God who created everything. The God of 7 billion people on the planet. But this same God also gives me the same caring attention a close friend would when I come to Him to pray. He already knows my needs, worries and desires. What a gift, to be able to converse with God! I need constant reminding of how amazing prayer can be, rather than something to check off my list. I am truly thankful for those who are consistent and diligent in praying for family, friends and their communities.

Hello, I'm a...missionary?

I went to Indiana last month to attend a support-raising conference. It was interesting
to meet various missionaries and hear about the ministry work they are involved in. When
asked what kind of missions I do, I hesitate for a moment because I'm not sure if
"running a soccer camp program" counts as mission work. During the conference, I
experienced a "mind-shift" that changed my perspective. It's been difficult to think of
soccer outreach in Cleveland as missions, but I'm coming around to the realization that I
am, in fact, a missionary.

Why has it been difficult for me to say, "I'm a missionary?" For one, I'm near a major US
city. Cleveland, Ohio isn't exactly the first place people think of when using the word
missions. Also, the mission "work" I do is hard to describe to others when much of my job
duties seem to be more "play" related, revolving around the game of soccer. I also don't
have teams of people visiting to see the ministry, taking pictures, and reporting back to
their churches.

The reality is, Cleveland is a mission field: People here need the gospel, youth soccer
players and families need to be ministered to, and coaches need training in serving in
their area of influence with integrity and passion. There is no one else that is doing what I
am specifically doing because it isn't easy. But I didn't realize that God called me into
"missions" until very recently. It's strange when you feel like you have become something
you never thought you would be, but I'm glad I am where I'm at and thank God for
orchestrating it all.

What does it mean to work for God?

I recently attended the Willow Creek Global Leadership Summit and was pleased to hear a message repeated several times during the conference. "God doesn't know the difference between church and politics, between the marketplace and non-profit. We are the ones who build these walls."

When I was a teenager, I didn't have a very clear view of what kind of career I was to have. I was decent in math and science in my studies, so I thought I would study engineering in college. I made the decision because it seemed logical and I needed to choose something to focus on. Over the course of my college years (let's just say it was an extended period of time), I had a number of experiences that began an internal struggle about what my occupation should be. I went on several mission trips in inner cities and in other countries and got more involved in ministry leadership. I felt I needed to either choose a 'normal' career in the marketplace or one in ministry.

This seems to be a common struggle for young people who get more serious about living out their faith. They feel they need to prove their commitment by going into so-called full-time ministry. In 1 Cor 7:17, Paul writes, "Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you, and remain as you were when God first called you. I don't know if I would've been a great engineer, but it is comforting to know God would use me in any job that I end up in. Paul also writes in Col 3:23, "Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people."

Sometimes my job feels great and other times it just feels like work. Over the last few years, I am starting to see that wherever God has me is where He wants me to be and He wants me to work for Him. Not for others. Not to prove my faith. Not to fulfill some sense of obligation. He wants me to work with love, integrity and justice out of gratitude for the way He created and gifted me.

My New Year's resolution? Small things.

New Year's resolutions. It's a tradition that some continue to partake in but it seems many Americans feel the tradition is a waste of time. According to statisticbrain.com, only 45% of Americans continue to follow the tradition of making a New Year's resolution, and only 8% of those are successful in achieving their goal. In fact, 25% give up on their resolution after the first week! I have made resolutions in the past. Typical ones like eating better or exercising more and have had varying levels of success but I'm not convinced they make much difference. For one, I often don't make specific enough goals and it is hard to measure if I'm making any progress. I also rarely tell anyone else what my goals are and as a result, I have no accountability. But I think often, I don't feel like making a resolution is worthwhile unless it's big. Big as in, a major change. I mean, what is the point of making a resolution if it's small or not significantly different from before?

This mindset is not bad and definitely needed at times in our lives when we really need to set out in a new direction. But big changes and life-altering paths are difficult to sustain and can often have a difficult transition period as we change routines or habits. It can impact relationships, or result in less sleep or new stresses. Besides the difficulty, big changes often don't tackle the root of the issue. For instance, if I decide to work out because I don't like my body, I set myself up for a difficult few months ahead. If I don't work out or fail to stay away from the candy aisle or am sick for a week that throws me off my routine, I will most probably look in the mirror and be discouraged. Even if I succeed and have a great workout schedule and get fit, I have now set the precedence that I am happy about myself only if I continue to stay fit and my body fits certain parameters. The root of the issue is that I have bought into the lie that I need to look a certain way and that doesn't change with a few months at the gym. Not that I really know how to get at the root of the issue, because I have struggled with my body image for many years and it isn't something I can deal with in a one-year resolution.

Ok, so what's your point? I will concede that sometimes change needs to come swiftly and abruptly, like tearing off the band-aid, but most often, the best and most sustainable change comes slowly and in small increments. My grocery buying habits are much better than a few years ago but it took some time and some careful planning to make sure I stuck to a specific list when I went to the store. Now, I get more nutrition in my cart and less useless carbs. My calendar and work organization has gone through countless changes and tweaks as I figure out how to balance being productive, social, active and also get enough rest and relaxation. Sure, the small things don't get a lot of hoopla or attention, but they are oh so important.

So my New Year's resolution for 2014? Small things. Simple things. Actually doing some of the things I believe in. Speaking up when I need to speak or being quiet when I need to hold my tongue. Giving up a couple cups of coffee each month to donate the money to a cause I care about. Last year, I noticed on the receipt that the cashier missed an item during checkout but I was already at home. It was a small item, and I debated for a while whether to drive back to the store. I wish I had. Sure, it's a small thing, but if I believe that is the right thing to do, then I should follow through. Even on the small things? Yes, especially on the small things. If we are faithful to do the small things, the big things become...well, not so big. Because we start to see everything as important. And not just things, but people. The small interactions with seemingly insignificant people become important and worthwhile. At least that's what I hope. So I have a reminder in my room that simply reads, "Small Things."

Happy New Year, everyone.